boyfriend face & music & cupcakes

I kept waking up all night. Such is the problem with nursing school. My stress level has been over 9000 since starting this semester. I wake up all the time, at all hours, with bizarre dreams. Can I not express how much I need for this semester to be over?! Prayers prayers prayers.

Last night I got to see (and kiss!) my boyfriend's naked face since he shaved his beard off. It was weird and wonderful at the same time.

rainy days and love

During the terrible rainy stretch over the weekend, Nathan and I hung out and had one of the best days ever! We went to Little Italy downtown and stuffed our faces (I ate a meatball sub the size of a leg and I was so full, it hurt, and he had pizza, which is what I should have gone with). Then we walked around downtown together in the rain (under an umbrella) and got lost trying to find Gigi's Cupcakes since I had only been there one time and Nathan had never been there. That place is amazing! We finally found it, and we got a kentucky bourbon cupcake, a pumpkin cupcake, and a tiramisu cupcake! Tiramisu was the best!

Then we went to Trader Joe's so I could get some wasabi seaweed snacks. It sounds gross, but they are pretty good! I also saw some calla lilies and I was super tempted to buy some, but I still have my beautiful roses from Valentine's Day, so I refrained even though they're my favorite! I really want to find some peonies somewhere. They are the most beautiful flowers ever (besides calla lilies)!

Then to Home Depot to find stuff for Nate to build a coat rack. Anyway, even though it doesn't sound like the greatest day (besides the food), it was one of those days where I just fell in love all over again! The whole time we held hands and skipped in the rain and told stories and hugged a lot and talked about lots and lots of things like family and friends and love and God. It was the best day I've had in a long time, even though it was cold and rainy.

I can't wait for a blessed day like that again!

wait, it's superbowl sunday?

I don't know, I didn't even watch any of it. Today was spent with me going to bed at 9 in the morning, taking a 4 hour nap, watching some Law and Order (there was a marathon!), and then driving over to Nate's house so we could go from there and see his grandmother. I am trying to become a better, more spiritually fulfilled person, especially in my relationship with Nathan. I feel like if we are (spiritually whole) we will have the best foundation for a super awesome relationship. I instantly feel better, and it gives me the drive to do better and be happier and have faith and trust just by taking the smallest initiative to educate and read and get closer to God. Today was a perfect day weather-wise, and I drove with the windows down and the 70 degree wind blowing in my hair and taking in everything. It's bizarre how I notice so little most of the time. I drove by the prettiest pastures, and saw an old couple holding hands on their porch, and the sun was reflecting off the water, and animals were grazing in the sun, and I just wanted to BE in that moment forever. No worries, no responsibilities... just carefree driving with my arm hanging out of the window and singing praise at the top of my lungs. Sweetest bliss.

Nathan and I got to go see his grandparents and listened to stories about how they had to kill their own chickens if they wanted to eat, and his grandfather told us a story about when his wife (Nathan's grandma) had a mastectomy, he wanted to get her something nice. So he went and got her a gold ring and said that he married her once, and he wanted to marry her all over again ("or something sweet along those lines" he said). That is just THE BEST. I want that.

We finished the evening with spaghetti and garlic bread and a fat salad, and laughing, and cuddling, and talking. The best. The best. The best.

P.S: Boyfriend says we are going somewhere for Valentine's Day weekend. It's a surprise, so I have no idea where, but I am so excited!

increased sleep latency = pinterest, blogging, & netflix

Well, actually it isn't increased latency if it's just disrupted sleep patterns which is very much what it is. I just went to bed at 9, woke up at 11 something, and I have my very first ever nursing clinical at 7 in the morning. Will I get ANY sleep? Perhaps. Maybe in an hour or two my circadian rhythm will kick back into "oh crap, you're supposed to be asleep" mode and I'll hit the pillow and make some Z's in sleepytown. Probably not.

Nursing school is... stressful still, but I am FINALLY getting into the swing of things. I think in the past two weeks I will have taken 3 tests, done my first clinical (STRESS CITY), written 3 papers, practiced for finals, and all the while maintaining a relationship with my Nathan and a part time job that gives me more hours than I could possibly want. I am relieved though, that I am officially going into finals with B's in ALL of my nursing classes. I don't know what is going to happen, but I have been praying, and God has carried me through this semester at my hardest points, and I know that he will continue to carry me through if it is what I am supposed to do.

My Grandmother and Dad are coming down from New York to say hello and to pack all of my Dad's stuff to move to New York and then Nathan, my brother, and I are going up to New York in December. Too many New York's.

Nathan and I went to this really good pasta place tonight called Mirko. It has homemade pasta and sauces and it was delish! Definitely will be going back again!

Improvements

Number one thing that I have to improve: Sleep.

For some reason, I can't sleep at night. No matter how exhausted I am from school and other things throughout the day, I can't turn my brain off at night. So, I end up paroosing Pinterest and watching countless episodes of Law and Order in the hopes that it will put me to sleep since I have seen all of them. Since I can't sleep, and I am all over Pinterest, I have found tons of things that I would like to try!

I am trying to lose weight and eat healthier. Nate comes over to the house quite a bit and I have found that I really like to cook. (It's much more enjoyable cooking for 2 than for myself, because when I'm by myself I can just eat whatever). I found tons and tons and tons of recipes on Pinterest that looked delicious and healthy, so I'm going to give it a try!

Before I said that I was getting crafty, and the more that I surf that wonderful ADD-fest website, the more I want a dress form and a sewing machine and a kiln and clay and glaze and furniture to paint, etc. I am working on seeing if someone around here can fire things for me since I can't afford even a little bitty kiln, and Nate's aunt (and mom) both said that I could borrow their sewing machines!

Now, I sound like a mom, which is creepy. I mean, I'm not a mom. I won't be a mom for a long time. However, the older I get and the more I study and stress out, the more I realize that I need an outlet, and I need creative outlets, so I'm going to try and do some new things to keep from going insane!

I had a goodnight tonight just spending time with Nate and his family. I was so comfortable laying with him on the couch indulging in some Spongebob (mature, I know) that I could have passed out! Then as soon as I left and got home, my brain was wired and I couldn't sleep. I'm a mess. OH! I have a job interview tomorrow! Today... whatever. I just hope and pray that it goes well because I need an income if I want to go on more cool dates with my sweetest boyfriend and if I want to eat better (cheap food is the most fattening ever!) and if I want to be crafty. I just want to be done with school and living in a cozy, bitty house and making my own cute clothes and eating good food with Nate. :)

It'll happen one day!