sleepy

It's only 6:30 in the afternoon and I am exhausted.

I have been feeling really "down" about my weight lately. I don't know why. I haven't really fluctuated or anything, I am just blah. I have been trying to eat better, but I haven't weighed in awhile. I wish I had time to work out... or the drive to work out. I am just so tired after school and work! Then I have to study and cook food and I want to spend time with my Nathan... ugh. I dunno. I just want to be super tiny, but I am just not built that way. I wish I could be content and feel beautiful. I feel that at 25 I should be pretty confident and comfortable in my own skin, but I'm not. It's not that I have bad outlying factors involved. No one tells me I'm unattractive or fat, and Nathan is just the best about trying to make me feel beautiful, but I don't feel beautiful, and that's all the difference.

Enough emo.

I''m ready for my boyfriend to come home and give me hugs, but I'll have to wait.

teef.

I forgot to say that I was going in for a consult to get my teeth fixed on Wednesday! SO EXCITED!

It's been a "thing"of mine for a long time. My gap. We are not friends and never will be. It hogs all of my photos and forces me to keep my mouth shut. Every time I look at a picture of myself, it's all that I can see! Everyone says it's "no big deal" and "you can't even see it!" but it's like when you have a big giant zit on your face and it's all you can focus on. I can't stand it! Partially I feel like I will look unlike myself without it since it's been a part of my smile for 25 years, but the other part of me can't wait to beam a smile and not have to worry about that big giant crack in the middle of my mouth! Anyway, I am going to go see how much it will cost. Let's pray it's not too much!

*not my mouth, but it's an idea.