love love love!

Things are bittersweet here.

Nathan and I had the most incredible weekend last weekend together. Nothing planned, but we went home to see my mom and actually pretty much spent the weekend alone! We got to cuddle, talk late into the night, laugh a lot, eat cupcakes, cruise the mall, AND on Sunday we actually got our wedding bands! Mine are (I got 2 ahh!) shiny and beautiful and vintage and amazing, and his is gorgeous and manly, and simple and so him. It warmed my very heart to see that ring on his finger! I'm used to seeing mine since I have had my shiny for a few months! I can't wait to make that man my husband! 

I passed all but one of my nursing tests (I failed by 2 points, something that I am actually relieved by after taking that research test... Dang).  I found my bridesmaids! Three sweet ladies from my nursing class are going to help me walk down the aisle! Who would have thought?! I have to get in hardcore saving mode.

Also, when I went home, the scale read 125 point something, but 125! Also, since then I have been a little lax eating Oreos and cream puffs from work! Work kills my diet. They are always making tasty treats! So, I actually bought a 400-calorie meal thing from Barnes and Noble this weekend, and I'm going to get back on track.

OH! And we had our engagement pictures made! They are beautiful! Well, the 3 preview pictures we had!
Our friend Carrie-Ann (who co-owns In Sienk Photography with her husband, Scott) took them, and they look wonderful! I cannot wait to get the rest back :)

Ahh! <3

With the ups, there are always downs, and we hit a low this week. I have unspoken prayer requests for my Mom and Dad. Financial trouble has been a HUGE burden on my family the last few years, and it doesn't seem to be lightening up anytime soon. Prayers are needed and appreciated! Also, Nathan's parents need some prayers too. We just need prayers all around!

Nathan and I are going to marriage counseling again next Saturday! I can't wait! But that also means that I need to get on the ball with my reading. I'm such a procrastinator it hurts. But, this really, really opened doors for us and I can't wait to learn and talk more with these Godly people and each other. This is going to do us wonders before we get married!

Speaking of which, yesterday was 13 months to the day of our marriage! Ahhh! I'll leave this post with that :)

excitement!

Things have been pretty wonderful lately! Nathan and I are learning more and more about each other and growing in God. He is reading Wild at Heart, which is giving him good insight into himself and into me, and I am reading about not being stressed out all the time! :) It is seeming to work! I am a lot happier and a lot more calm, not thinking about the things that I used to all the time, and now they are growing rarer and rarer everyday (which I am super thankful for!). I went to the doctor the other day and I am still hovering around 130 (129.5). I feel like mostly because I haven't been sticking to my diet like I should be! Nathan and I have been enjoying ourselves... with food! The other day I took him to a Mexican restaurant that he had never been to, and while the fish tacos were delicious, the pickled jalepenos super hurt my stomach :(

I also bought some new Chacos the other day after much pursuasion from Nathan, and we toured around 5 Points in Athens and ate a lot of pizza at Earth Fare. It was a wonderful, wonderful day! Today after I get off work and Nathan meets me home, we are going for a long walk, and then we are going to eat all of the calories we just burned by indulging in Olive Garden's unlimited pasta bowl. It is my favorite event of the year, except for Christmas. Maybe Thanksgiving, because I get to ride horses. But, pasta, for real. Also, today I looked for more wedding stuff at Goodwill, like I do all week, but I couldn't find anything for the wedding. However, I did find 4 dresses, 2 of which were 3 dollars a piece, a cardigan for me, and a flannel shirt for Nathan that matches my flannel dress that I bought! I smell engagement pictures!!!!

Anyway, we are narrowing down plans for our pre-marital counseling, and wedding planning has gone on hold for the most part. I have to start school on Thursday, and I am not ready! At all! I have a Med Math test that I HAVE to make a 100 on, so prayers would be great!

The end.

Fiance is the best artist!

I love this plaid dress! It has pockets!



This one looks like those blue and white china plates!



Plaid  dress and my Mad Men style sheath dress! <3

happenings

I haven't written lately! I know. I'm horrible! And so much has happened!
We booked the venue AND a photographer!
His name is John Shim, and this is his website: http://www.johnshim.com/
He's very talented and we are so happy that he is going to be shooting our wedding!

I have been super falling more and more in love with my fiance! It still feels amazing and awesome to say that! We have had crazy days lately. Just a lot of going and going and not much time for relaxing! We went crafting and got supplies to make bunting and went antiquing some more and he found some real cool suspenders this weekend that he is going to wear to the wedding!

We went to North Carolina to see his Poppy (mine too now I guess!) this weekend. Friday we went and finalized some stuff with our venue, which we were pleasantly surprised that it had been expanded for the same price that we paid for when it was smaller, then Saturday we drove up and spent the day walking and holding hands and spending time with family and eating way too much food. We went antiquing in Greensboro and got some delicious chai tea at a cool coffee shop where Santa was drawing pictures, found some cool stuff for Nathan, but not so much for me, but it's ok :) Today we went to church and ate more tons of good food and I am stuffed! We stopped at another antique store in Lavonia that was incredible, but we didn't have enough time to look at everything in there! It was humongous! Then we went and ate pizza and talked about married life and what we want and got some scratch off lotto tickets (I won 2 free tickets!) and laughed a lot :) We also locked my keys in the car this morning after church... but all ended up well with only a few bad words said. (Just kidding)

I started a new job at the school! It doesn't pay awesome, but the schedule is great and anything is better than nothing! Most of that money is going to go towards the wedding! I just want to get married right now. I love Nathan so much. He's the sweetest! The other day I was having a bad day (it happens...I'm a girl) and he kept calling me his cinnanom bun. Yes, cinnanom. So when he came over to see me he brought me some cinnamon doughnuts from Krispy Kreme :) He's wonderful! And I need to snatch him up quick and for forever!

I need to start working on my nursing stuff since I go back in less than a month... Oh man. Am I looking forward to it? Yes... and no. It was stressful and wonderful and I learned a lot, but it strained a lot. I lost social time, free time, fiance (then boyfriend!) time, and sleep. I lost a lot of sleep. But, I am looking forward to learning more and edging closer and closer to my degree. I need prayers!

G'night!

pretty walk at Poppy's house

venue!

suspenders!

expanded venue!

soup for breakfast

It's weird and all, but it works when you're sick.

I'm going on day 7 (Nathan is on day 9) of being sick. Everyday there is a new symptom it seems, or at least, things are getting worse. I can breathe out of my nose now, but my cough has reached croup-like status, and i have terrible cramps and and and... it's just awful. And if Nathan is any indication of what this thing will be like for me, I have at least another 2 days of this mess. It's terrible. All I can be grateful for is that I am not in nursing school, or doing an externship. I feel like I would have failed out by now and gotten fired. It's heavily debilitating. The day before yesterday I slept for 4 hours during the day and then slept all night. It's ridiculous.

I had the biggest breakfast yesterday! Nate made me a waffle (which I haven't had in year and years) and I had a sausage, egg, and cheese biscuit, and fruit. It doesn't seem that huge, but those carbs had me going ALL day. Then we sat in the bed and drank tea and cuddled. It was wonderful :)

I've been thinking a lot about what I want to do while I'm "young". I really want to travel. I have never been past West Virginia at the furthest, and I would love to go see Oregon, Colorado, Washington, California, even Texas! Just anywhere! I would love to see everything and take everything God has made! Why should I be limited to one coast? I shouldn't! Waking up to these different places would be wonderful and an experience of growth I believe. Like you leave home to find home. How can I know where I'm happiest if I never look?

Ahh. I would love it!

I also want to hike at least part of the AT, preferably with Nathan. You would super get to know each other better, that's for sure! I know at times I would hate it. Absolutely hate it and want to give up. But having encouragement and knowing how far I have hiked and knowing how awesome my legs would be at the end of it might be enough to keep me going!

I want to super travel oversees too. I'd love to just backpack across Europe for like a month, just taking in everything. Italy, Ireland, France, Japan, Germany, Greece, Spain... all of it! The architecture over there would be amazing to see, and I feel like it would be really moving. Just to know that hundreds and thousands of years ago these things were built for their beauty and not for their efficiency like over here. The top place I would love to go would be Israel. It really sucks that things are dangerous over there because I feel like that would be the best moment of my life. Seeing where my Savior was born and walked and taught. It gives me shivers! I'd probably cry the whole time like a baby.

There are SO many things that I even want to do here! All those times that Nathan and I just sit at home when we could be walking the Greenway, or visiting the botanical gardens, or exploring Athens, or Madison, or going to the Aquarium, or the World of Coke, or the Renaissance Fair, or visiting our coffee shop, or having a picnic. I just want to explore!

I am a very torn person. A lot of me is a homebody, and then there is a part of me that just loves to travel and run away from everything. I'm afraid that if I didn't have Nathan I would live my life as a nomad, taking crappy part time jobs everywhere just so I could save up enough money to go go go go. Life gets overwhelming and I want to escape. It's bizarre. Why would I want to run from everything I know to somewhere that I know nothing about? Maybe the newness of it all would be more overwhelming and would take my mind off of it. I don't know.

Enough of my ramblings.

the best

I had the best day! I always have the best days when I can be with Nate, especially when they are impromptu dates! He always makes me the happiest and I can forget all of my troubles when I'm with him. He's simply the sweetest man!I love talking with him and hugging him and just BEING with him. I have been blessed.

best weekend!

This weekend I went home with Nathan to see my mom and my brother! It's been a long time since we both got to go home, so it was wonderful! We went to Longhorn and ate the best food, and played music and drew on our old etch-a-sketch that we found (some of us were better than others...) which super made us laugh, and then on Saturday I adopted a kitten!

Pardon my hair, but meet Tango!

He's such a little love bunny (kitten)! He's the sweetest! Well, except for when we were trying to leave and he got under the bed and INTO the box spring... needless to say we were a little late to drive an hour and a half to Nate's house to eat dinner! I think he's a little jealous of Tango... but tonight he loved all over him. He'll get used to it ;)

We stayed up at Nate's house until like, one in the morning. I am far too old for that, and Nate would agree. But we had fun eating burritos and talking a lot about family and things with his mom (while Tango was sleeping on our laps... did I mention how wonderful he is?).

Then Sunday I got up early and cleaned my room so Tango wouldn't get lost in my disarray, and took a nap with Tango in my armpit, and then Nathan came over and we explored downtown Athens. I super love doing that now! I don't know why, but I used to hesitate to explore downtown. I just wasn't into it. But I love just having my boyfriend on my arm and no ideas in our head to where we are going, and we just wing it! They are the best dates! We were both super hungry so we went to the Transmetropolitan, which Nate had been to before, but I hadn't. I got some pasta that was AMAZING, and he got a chicken panini that looked pretty great too. I think we are going to try somewhere new next time we go downtown.

We had a super long talk about ex's and things... it wasn't a terrible conversation, and it definitely wasn't heated or anything. I don't really even remember what got us talking about it, but it was kind of enlightening. It definitely made me realize again how lucky I am to have met Nathan after praying and praying and praying for God to send me the right man for my heart! I take these things for granted sometimes, and just talking about our pasts made me realize how much we both have grown; even in the past year of knowing each other. I am especially proud of Nathan. He seems to have grown into a super wonderful man in the past year. He's becoming more sure of himself, putting priorities in order, etc. I like to think that I helped with that, but that's being cocky ;)

Seriously though, it was an overall good talk. I think a lot of my growth happened over the two years from 2009 to the end of 2010. I had a lot of loss in 2008 and kind of lost my mind. Getting back into church and solidifying my faith in God made ALL of the difference in my life. I knew that I couldn't get anywhere good without giving it all to God. My faith never really faded or was lost; it was just realizing what exactly being a woman of Christ meant. I had a friend bring me to the door, and I went through, and after prayers and not thinking about finding someone for awhile, God led me to the right one through a very unlikely door. And I am ever so grateful for it.

Also, notice that it is 2:00 a.m. and I have to be at a clinical at 6:30. My roommate's cat has a bell on her collar (DUMB... she doesn't even go outside. What the heck do you need that for?) and she came prancing in my room to get Tango and woke us up. Tango has no problem falling back asleep. I on the other hand...

ANYWAY, then Nathan and I went home after paroosing downtown and drinking some Starbucks and watching hipsters and cuddled with Tango and did some Mad Libs which made me realize how much the "S" word makes me giggle when used as an adjective. Seriously, I try not to cuss (or curse), but that word is just so funny when used in certain sentences.I need a big ol' giant book of those so that I can belly laugh all the day long instead of studying for Psych or Med-Surg. When am I going to be done with school?! Guh.

So, it was the best weekend I have had in a long while. ALSO, I WEIGH 136! I'm still not happy. I'm so dumb. I remember when I weighed like 150 and I said, man, I really wish that I weighed 135. I'd be so happy! But, I'm a pound away and am really hoping for more of 125. Being a woman blows. Good thing I have a supportive boyfriend who thinks that I'm pretty no matter what I say about myself. What a gentleman!

Oh, and I'm making a bucket list of sorts on Pinterest since everyone else is and I think it's kind of cool.

Long post is over. I have to cuddle with Tango and try to sleep for 3 hours or something.