I had the best day! I always have the best days when I can be with Nate, especially when they are impromptu dates! He always makes me the happiest and I can forget all of my troubles when I'm with him. He's simply the sweetest man!I love talking with him and hugging him and just BEING with him. I have been blessed.
4.28.2012
4.27.2012
mullets
I had a rough night filled with anxiety, depression, stomach troubles, irritation, and sadness. Nursing school will be the end of me. No reason in particular besides the fact that I have some big decisions to make. I think it just hit me last night that I really am going to have to sacrifice time in my dearest relationships to make it in nursing school, and that really weighs heavy on my heart. I thought I'd be able to juggle a boyfriend and friends and family and nursing school. I've already cut out friends, and family time is at a minimum, and now I really am going to have to cut into boyfriend time, especially for next semester. It is... extremely difficult. It breaks my heart. The things that keep me sane distract me from school, and if I don't pass then I'll be a mess. But if I have to greatly reduce boyfriend time, which could automatically be worse next semester due to his job, then I'll just be depressed all the time. I don't know what to do.
It really seems that nothing is in my favor lately, and that makes me so truly sad. All of the things I want to happen just aren't, and it's killing me. My morale in school is shot for multiple reasons, I'm broke, burnt out, and having stress related to other things in life that are out of my control. I don't know what to do. I haven't been in this place in a long time.
Anyway, I got a 4 week trim, so I don't have a mullet anymore. I'm 4 weeks closer to growing this thing out.
Pray for me please.
It really seems that nothing is in my favor lately, and that makes me so truly sad. All of the things I want to happen just aren't, and it's killing me. My morale in school is shot for multiple reasons, I'm broke, burnt out, and having stress related to other things in life that are out of my control. I don't know what to do. I haven't been in this place in a long time.
Anyway, I got a 4 week trim, so I don't have a mullet anymore. I'm 4 weeks closer to growing this thing out.
Pray for me please.
4.26.2012
boyfriend face & music & cupcakes
I kept waking up all night. Such is the problem with nursing school. My stress level has been over 9000 since starting this semester. I wake up all the time, at all hours, with bizarre dreams. Can I not express how much I need for this semester to be over?! Prayers prayers prayers.
Last night I got to see (and kiss!) my boyfriend's naked face since he shaved his beard off. It was weird and wonderful at the same time.
Last night I got to see (and kiss!) my boyfriend's naked face since he shaved his beard off. It was weird and wonderful at the same time.
4.24.2012
counting down
As of midnight, I will have a week of school left, including finals!
I am praying so hard to be able to pass med surg, so any positive thoughts and prayers that anyone can spare and send my way I will be eternally grateful!
Nathan shaved his face today! Which might not sound like a big deal, but he hadn't shaved in in 8 years and he did it because I wanted to see his face! ;) He's so handsome!
I am praying so hard to be able to pass med surg, so any positive thoughts and prayers that anyone can spare and send my way I will be eternally grateful!
Nathan shaved his face today! Which might not sound like a big deal, but he hadn't shaved in in 8 years and he did it because I wanted to see his face! ;) He's so handsome!
somber & love
Today I wrote a 6 page paper for med surg and I'm not done. I took a nap.
I also went to see Nathan's grandma, Mama Lou.
She's just one of the sweetest women I've ever met and I'm glad that I got to know her even for a little bit before her decline. She has cancer, and she's being so strong. Her faith in God astounds me. Nathan and I were talking about this the other day. She said that things are the way that God wants them to be and everything would work out. This woman who is dying of cancer, is stronger than I have ever been to even speak that. It's the bravest thing to be able to say that and have faith the way that she does.
Nathan took the sweetest picture of her and her husband, his Papa Sam, praying together. It's inspiring, sad, humbling, and love.
It was so nice to be able to talk with her and just sit and be. She wanted Nathan to play the piano immediately when we came in, and he did. His playing always makes me tear up because it's so beautiful, but watching her just take in the music was amazing. I could tell it was just what she wanted and needed to hear. I can just see how much it makes her whole day to hear him play.
I need to appreciate what I have in my life. If I can live to be as faithful and happy and wonderful as Mama Lou, then I'll be truly blessed.
I also went to see Nathan's grandma, Mama Lou.
She's just one of the sweetest women I've ever met and I'm glad that I got to know her even for a little bit before her decline. She has cancer, and she's being so strong. Her faith in God astounds me. Nathan and I were talking about this the other day. She said that things are the way that God wants them to be and everything would work out. This woman who is dying of cancer, is stronger than I have ever been to even speak that. It's the bravest thing to be able to say that and have faith the way that she does.
Nathan took the sweetest picture of her and her husband, his Papa Sam, praying together. It's inspiring, sad, humbling, and love.
It was so nice to be able to talk with her and just sit and be. She wanted Nathan to play the piano immediately when we came in, and he did. His playing always makes me tear up because it's so beautiful, but watching her just take in the music was amazing. I could tell it was just what she wanted and needed to hear. I can just see how much it makes her whole day to hear him play.
I need to appreciate what I have in my life. If I can live to be as faithful and happy and wonderful as Mama Lou, then I'll be truly blessed.
4.23.2012
hawaiian pizza & fairytale houses
I had a fantastic and a rough weekend at the same time. It can happen, amazingly enough. And when it's rough, it can be over in an instant, like a quick storm. Lots of tears, and lots of hugs, and lots of everything will be alright.
And it will.
I have a week of class left, and then 3 days of finals. All I can do is thank GOD and pray that He helps me to pass my med surg class. For some reason, I am having a really hard time in there, teetering on the edge of failure and passing. My professor seems confident, but it is terrifying to me that I could fail. After finals, I have a couple of weeks until my internship starts. I will absolutely relish in the time that I have off to do absolutely nothing! However, I do have two classes that I have to take this summer. Spanish II and Public Speaking. Two classes I am not thrilled to be taking. However, it will be time I need away from the stress of nursing school and to focus on my relationships and God and taking in life and being appreciative rather than complaining of burnout.
And it will.
I have a week of class left, and then 3 days of finals. All I can do is thank GOD and pray that He helps me to pass my med surg class. For some reason, I am having a really hard time in there, teetering on the edge of failure and passing. My professor seems confident, but it is terrifying to me that I could fail. After finals, I have a couple of weeks until my internship starts. I will absolutely relish in the time that I have off to do absolutely nothing! However, I do have two classes that I have to take this summer. Spanish II and Public Speaking. Two classes I am not thrilled to be taking. However, it will be time I need away from the stress of nursing school and to focus on my relationships and God and taking in life and being appreciative rather than complaining of burnout.
4.16.2012
rough days
I can't wait for school to be over.
I super enjoy my mental health clinicals... for the most part. The hardest thing is watching children- KIDS- talking about sexual abuse that they have endured, and acting out, and trying to kill themselves, and just messing up their lives, and other people ruining them... It's just hard. That on top of 3 tests this week, numerous projects, and no time, my nerves are pretty much shot. Thank goodness for my hero of a boyfriend. We are going on a mountain date! Those are the best dates. I get to breathe in the fresh air, drink coffee, play mancala, listen to Nathan play guitar, people watch, and just take it all in. I can't wait to live in the mountains someday!
It's seriously the best. Mountains, the one I love, and peace :) I couldn't think of a more perfect place! Rain or shine :) I love it I love it I love it!
God, please get me through this week!
And prayers are welcomed for my upcoming Med Surg and 2 OB tests this week. Thanks!
I super enjoy my mental health clinicals... for the most part. The hardest thing is watching children- KIDS- talking about sexual abuse that they have endured, and acting out, and trying to kill themselves, and just messing up their lives, and other people ruining them... It's just hard. That on top of 3 tests this week, numerous projects, and no time, my nerves are pretty much shot. Thank goodness for my hero of a boyfriend. We are going on a mountain date! Those are the best dates. I get to breathe in the fresh air, drink coffee, play mancala, listen to Nathan play guitar, people watch, and just take it all in. I can't wait to live in the mountains someday!
It's seriously the best. Mountains, the one I love, and peace :) I couldn't think of a more perfect place! Rain or shine :) I love it I love it I love it!
God, please get me through this week!
And prayers are welcomed for my upcoming Med Surg and 2 OB tests this week. Thanks!
4.14.2012
mountains
Well, I worked out today for the first time in probably a year... yeah. But I did well and hiked about 2 miles up and down a mountain :) It was wonderful! I just miss Nathan though!
He went camping with his dad last night, and I could have gone, but I need to be working on school stuff... instead, I made a new Facebook page and slept a lot. I won't get to see him until Tuesday night! I can't stand it!
School is almost over and I couldn't be happier!
Too bad I don't get a real Summer break and I need God to get me through these last few weeks!
Prayers prayers prayers!
He went camping with his dad last night, and I could have gone, but I need to be working on school stuff... instead, I made a new Facebook page and slept a lot. I won't get to see him until Tuesday night! I can't stand it!
School is almost over and I couldn't be happier!
Too bad I don't get a real Summer break and I need God to get me through these last few weeks!
Prayers prayers prayers!
4.08.2012
easter and birthdays
Happy Easter!
It's a blessed day! I am so happy that I have what I have and am so thankful to God for it :)
Today is also my sweetest Nathan's birthday, but we celebrated Friday! We went to NONA and I gave him presents and we cuddled and watched our trash TV and told each other how much we love each other and and and... it was the best :)
I just love him so much! I want to hurry up and get married and move into the mountains and live a super chill, peaceful life.
I am so blessed and I can't express that enough!
It's a blessed day! I am so happy that I have what I have and am so thankful to God for it :)
Today is also my sweetest Nathan's birthday, but we celebrated Friday! We went to NONA and I gave him presents and we cuddled and watched our trash TV and told each other how much we love each other and and and... it was the best :)
I just love him so much! I want to hurry up and get married and move into the mountains and live a super chill, peaceful life.
I am so blessed and I can't express that enough!
4.06.2012
4.04.2012
haircut: Demi Moore a la Ghost era...
| is what it reminds me of. |
| if i didn't brush it to the side, i'd have Molly's hair. |
 |
| new hair photo extravaganza with Tango cat. |
4.03.2012
boy cut
I cut my hair like a boy and this is what happened. Shock --> crying --> hysterical --> panic attack --> sleepiness --> growing into it. We will see.
I have been on a diet for 3 weeks now, and I dropped 5 pounds from dieting! Sometimes I look in the mirror and I don't feel any smaller. :/ But I have been doing really good. I have to stay on my diet this week because Saturday I am going to super cheat when I take Nathan to go to NONA for his birthday. Then back on the diet again.
I just am so burnt out on school. I just want to marry Nathan and live in a little cabin with a loft bed in the mountains and help people for free and make jewelry and take pictures and then one day have little mountain/hipster babies the end.
I have been on a diet for 3 weeks now, and I dropped 5 pounds from dieting! Sometimes I look in the mirror and I don't feel any smaller. :/ But I have been doing really good. I have to stay on my diet this week because Saturday I am going to super cheat when I take Nathan to go to NONA for his birthday. Then back on the diet again.
I just am so burnt out on school. I just want to marry Nathan and live in a little cabin with a loft bed in the mountains and help people for free and make jewelry and take pictures and then one day have little mountain/hipster babies the end.
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