I didn’t look to see when the last time I posted. I imagine some time last year.
It’s been rough. Not going to lie.
Since I had my hives/stress breakout last July, it’s evolved into full body erythrodermic psoriasis. But it’s only since November since we figured out it was psoriasis that was slowly taking over my body, and only within the last month or so have we landed on the specific diagnosis of erythrodermic psoriasis.
It’s caused ER visits due to insane itching to where I was making myself bleed (I have scars now on my hip…), shock from fluid shifts that cause my heart rate to fly into the 160’s and wouldn’t come down without steroids and fluids.
I got started on Skyrizi. I have my second shot Monday.
I am also doing a protocol to get rid of the COVID protein spike? So, my psoriasis rash is starting to get “better” but I don’t know what it’s due to. So I’m going to finish both treatments and see.
Haven’t been able to work consistently in months.
It’s hard.
I feel like a burden.
Nathan tells me I’m not, but our whole house is stressed right now.
I’m trying to find another job that would allow me to not do patient care. Praying for that.
I do know that God has a plan for me. I don’t know what it is, but He has one. I’m just praying it becomes apparent soon.
Kids are sweet.
Right now we are all sick with some kind of flu-like thing. Coughing and snot and body aches. I was spiking a temp so that’s why I’m awake. Went down to take some Tylenol and was real disoriented. I knew I had a fever. 100 ish. Not crazy but enough to mess me up apparently.
Poor Ethan threw up last night :( Benjamin came in to tell us like the sweet big brother that he is.
Charlie keeps me guessing! That stinking 3 year old was reading road signs the other day! So smart. He is too smart for his own good I think.
Nathan and I just celebrated our 13th Valentine’s Day together! It’s our 10 year anniversary this year too, so I’m praying for complete healing, a steady career to fit my new normal, and for a way for us to celebrate.
I really want to see a therapist. I had a counselor who was great; but I think I need to see a psychiatrist to help me dig deep and figure out why I have such horrendous anxiety.
The thought of being alone and without Nathan is terrifying to me. This all started after that mess in the summer. I’m sure it has to do with PTSD and me wanting someone around because all of these events happen without warning. But I need to talk to someone. I used to be a very confident, independent woman. Now I don’t go anywhere unless it’s with Nathan and the kids. It’s bizarre.
I’m sweaty, fever is breaking. I am going to try to sleep.
Pray pray pray.
